The National Nigerian Men’s Workshop
The first-of-its-kind national Nigerian men’s workshop, in March 2018, was a three-day meeting of twenty-four strong, great, wise men from across the RC Communities in Nigeria. Chioma Okonkwo, the Area Reference Person for Lagos (Nigeria), led the workshop, and Kingsley Ibekwe, the Area Reference Person for Enugu (Nigeria), hosted it.
We took off [began] with RC fundamentals, followed by a series of two- and three-way sessions. The support groups were great. Mine was a six-man team—“super support group,” I called it.
Later we shared our bitter, devastating experiences of how the air, land, and waters are all polluted. Our mandate was to work hard on climate change. Today and together we will think about and act to save our sick and dying environment and all the creatures and other life therein. This must be done if we want to have our tomorrow. We were called to put our efforts toward “sustaining all life.”
Then oppression! Oppression!! Oppression!!! We discussed its various forms—whether internalized, externalized, or immortalized. Colonialism, neocolonialism, and intra and intercolonialism were x-rayed. We did sessions and more sessions to discharge on the damage done over the years to our hearts and minds.
Then the highlight for me: answering the question “What is hard about being a man?” This took us the extra mile in our support groups and general discussions.
Much more of this will make the men stronger and happier together.
Rumuogba, Port-Harcourt, Rivers State, Nigeria
I count myself privileged to have played a role in organizing this workshop. I had lots of help: I called up my support group for sessions; I was part of an online Nigerian leaders’ group led by Rudy Nickens (the Regional Reference Person for Iowa, Kansas, Missouri, and Nebraska, USA); I had online sessions with men’s leaders in Ghana and South Africa.
The workshop proper [itself] was sincerely wonderful. Chioma handled the teachings with utmost dexterity and precision.
We all had the chance to connect and reconnect—when everything around us is working against connection. Within the first quarter of 2018, more than two thousand persons have been killed and many more injured across Nigeria in the farmers’ and herdsmens’ crisis. At the workshop we had men from every part of the country, including men whose families are farmers and herdsmen. We connected in sessions, while noticing how our government and environments are trying to pit us against each other [make us fight and compete with each other].
To all the men who came to the workshop I say, “Thanks for being real, zestful men. Keep sharing sessions and discharging always!”
New Haven, Enugu, Nigeria
Most (non-RC) workshops are overhyped and offer little of value. You see the same guys, over and over again, giving the same canned [standardized] speech. That is why when I receive requests from conference organizers to participate in or speak at their events, my answer is almost always no.
However, I have attended annual RC workshops for about eighteen years—first and foremost because RCers are the most down-to-earth [sensible, unpretentious], understanding, helpful, attentive, and upstanding people I know; and second because the workshops are about exchanging help and making the world a better place (unlike most conferences, which are nothing more than a parade of speakers who pitch [promote] product after product to the audience).
In addition, I believe relationships are the greatest asset one can have in life, and at RC workshops I get to meet and interact with lots of like-minded people and build meaningful relationships for a better world.
During the Nigeria Men’s Workshop, we talked about “investing in yourself” and how it is the best investment one can make. I consider going to RC workshops every year an investment in myself. I leave a better person than when I arrived. I get to know more people. I hear new ideas. I improve my teaching skills. I become more knowledgeable.
Ugbene II, Enugu State, Nigeria
At the National Men‘s Workshop we had amazing sessions with lots of discharge. I laughed and laughed, going back down memory lanes [recalling past experiences].
Men are expected to be superheroes economically and culturally and in handling their responsibilities. There’s a lot of societal pressure. It meant a lot to me to understand how to love and make time for oneself, amidst every other thing.
I also learnt about rigid patterns, which alter the naturalness in people. I began to understand why some people behave the way they do.
Mummy Chioma raised the issue of climate change and how inhabitable Africa will be in thirty years. I thought about how this is going to affect human lives. Africa is the largest dumpsite in the world, while other continents that get resources from Africa are safe. The world must come together to rescue Africa from this. I’m still discharging on it. Personally I will take up [participate in] sensitization drives that let people at the grassroots know the dangers Africa faces so that they will participate in the movement to restore our environments.
In RC we become better humans and more able to contribute positively to the society at large [as a whole]. We have the option of making the world a better place. Let’s do it.
Abuja, Federal Capital Territory, Nigeria
(Present Time 192, July 2018)