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Generating New Ones

Dear Harvey,

It was good to meet you at the last Regional leaders' workshop. I wanted to share with you how incredible I have been finding the understatement. Since the workshop I have been using it almost exclusively, both as a counselor and client, and the results have been truly phenomenal. I have noticed how much more present I am all day and how much sustained energy I have.

What I have found most helpful is my own little understatement that gets at the internalized oppression I carry around as a Chinese woman: "It sometimes happens that someone likes a Chinese woman."

Here are some of the others I've come up with:

To get at my frozen need for my father: "It sometimes happens that a man treats his family well - with love, support, respect, and complete tenderness."

To lead a big life: "It sometimes happens that a Chinese woman gets exactly what she wants in life," or, "It sometimes happens that a woman makes it on her own successfully, doing what she loves to do."

Others have worked well for those I have counseled. For example, for learning: "It sometimes happens that a young person gets completely supported in every aspect of her learning."

For young people: "It sometimes happens that a young person gets exactly the amount of attention that she wants."

For owning-class women: "It sometimes happens that an owning-class woman notices how much she is loved."

Amy Tai
Waltham, Massachusetts, USA

Last modified: 2020-07-02 14:27:35+00