Using My Counseling Perspective to Make a Difference
I write this for anyone who wants to make a difference in the world. I especially want to invite and encourage anyone who is relatively new to RC (and may not have an official leadership position) to experiment with using their RC perspective in a useful and satisfying way.
Early in the pandemic, I decided to gather a small group of people who were working to make change. Each Zoom meeting was forty minutes long. The consistent theme was how to thrive as an activist. Although I did not talk about RC or use RC terms, the elements were there, and it worked well.
People immediately understood and agreed to complete confidentiality. We took timed turns. At each meeting I talked about the value of listening, “just” listening. I also said, “Feelings are fine.” A typical agenda would include the following:
- A brief attention-out opening
- A “go-around” on “What is something you have done that you are proud of to make things better for humans?”
- Maybe a question like “What are your thoughts about your next steps?” or “What has been especially satisfying and/or challenging?” or “What about your background makes your work easier or harder?” or “When you think of reaching out to people who disagree with you, what comes up?” This last one got a lot of reaction from people.
- A “go-around” on “What are you taking away from tonight’s meeting?” Their answers showed me that the group had been effective.
Here are a few of my observations:
- To thrive, people need other people.
- People who regularly work together in a group cherish that opportunity to connect in a personal way.
- A core group of the busiest activists has formed.
- When I take my turn, I have new thoughts.
- We sometimes take for granted the free attention, skills, and perspectives we have as Co-Counselors.
- The meetings are effective and easy to lead.
I invite you to “try your wings” at this. It’s a great way to notice your personal influence. You can offer your excellent listening without needing to do more. You can do this with any constituency—friends, parents, women, immigrants, and so on. And you may be able to bring some of these people into RC.
You will make a difference!
Newburyport, Massachusetts, USA
(Present Time 204, July 2021)