Changes to the Guidelines
(This format does not allow us to show deletions and insertions, only the final adopted language. Print version shows deletions and insertions. All of the changes to the 2017 Guidelines can be viewed here.)
B.2. CREATING OPPORTUNITIES FOR PEOPLE TO MOVE TOWARD BECOMING CO-COUNSELORS
Our interactions with people with whom we have ongoing relationships often offer opportunities to provide them with pieces of RC theory and practice that would be useful to them in their lives. For example, we can:
1. play with their young people and explain to both the adults and the young people why we play the way we do,
2. talk about how we have handled difficulties similar to the ones they are struggling with,
3. offer to listen as they think aloud about handling a troubling situation, and ask them to also listen to us,
4. share information about liberation theory and about how oppression and internalized oppression can impact us,
5. after listening, thoughtfully disagree with the negative feelings they have about themselves and others, and
6. talk about something that we’ve learned in RC that is relevant to their situation.
REASON
We cannot expect everyone to come quickly into RC. However, we need not wait to provide people with some ideas and methods for improving their lives and changing society. How we do things can also make them aware of the usefulness of what we know, and as it makes sense, move people toward learning Co-Counseling.
B.4. FUNDAMENTALS CLASSES1
Each Area and Developing Community is encouraged to have at least one fundamentals class each year.
REASON
Providing access to our theory and practice is one of the basic purposes of an RC Community. Fundamentals classes have proven themselves to be an effective way to do this. Additionally, they give members of the existing Community opportunities to learn and practice leadership, learn counseling theory and practice more fully, and gain new Co-Counselors.
C.3. STRUCTURE OF RC CLASSES
Screening for Classes
Prospective students need the teacher’s permission to be admitted to the class. Teachers accept as class members people whom we expect will contribute to the effective functioning of the class by, for example:
1. participating in the class without disruption,
2. functioning as a Co-Counselor within a relatively short period of time,
3. following the Guidelines (such as the no-socializing policy and the one-point program of RC),
4. maintaining confidentiality of Co-Counselors’ sessions, and
5. not using alcohol, marijuana, or other illegal or recreational drugs or substances (for example, chemical substances for sniffing) that affect mental processes, for at least twenty-four (24) hours before a class or Co-Counseling session. However, individuals who meet other screening criteria are not required to stop taking psychiatric drugs to attend RC classes. (See Guideline O. Psychiatric Drugs.2 )
Teachers are to ask prospective students about their use of drugs and addictive substances, including psychiatric drugs, explain why they are asking, and introduce them to our policies. For example, prospective students should be told that using these substances will limit the benefit they will receive from RC. Teachers need to inform themselves and their students about the effects of alcohol and other drugs on the discharge and re-evaluation process. The teacher should make it clear that the teacher, backed by the RC Community, is in full support of the prospective student, and stands against the use of these substances and oppressions that push people to use them.
D.2. REQUIREMENTS OF RC TEACHERS
Moving Against Distress
When approving teachers, Reference Persons shall take into account the applicants’ competence, responsibility, relationships with others, and capacity to handle their surroundings and their own well-being. The goal is to have each teacher be free of any pattern that interferes with being an excellent model. Classist, racist, anti-Jewish, sexist, age-related, and other oppressive patterns, including greed, are part of our cultures. Teachers are to challenge all patterns in RC activities, and in their own lives, and discharge on them.
Addictive behavior3 will yield to discharge. Meanwhile, teachers are expected:
1. not to engage in or defend the use of alcohol, marijuana, or other mind-altering drugs,4 including psychiatric drugs, and not defend the use of tobacco and e-cigarettes,5 and to understand and share information about the harmfulness of their use,
2. to not defend the use of pornography,6 prostitution, and other sex industries.7
3. to have counseled on the sexual distresses that society has installed upon them (as have been installed on all of us) to the extent that they do not engage in sexual contact for money or other forms of compensation or otherwise collude with the exploitation of anyone who is compelled or driven to offer such contact by violence, threat, force, economic conditions, or oppression,
4. to work to free themselves from rigid and repetitive sexual behaviors,
5. to counsel on and challenge all distresses related to addictive behavior, including sex, money, food, and on the use or avoidance of medications8 and/or medical treatment,
6. not to intentionally do anything for patterned reasons that endangers themselves or others,
7. to work openly as a client with a Reference Person(s) about any struggles to meet these expectations, and to work on any attitudes of superiority toward people who have been unable to free themselves from distressed situations and behaviors forced on them by society.
Teachers are expected to discharge and take action against oppressive patterns:
1. for their own successful re-emergence,
2. to be models for other people,
3. to teach successful classes and build successful Communities, and
4. to be leaders wherever they are.
Attitude toward Teaching
In our experience neither eagerness to teach nor reluctance to teach indicates how successful a teacher will be. Reference Persons are not obligated to certify individuals whose patterns seek approval through being a teacher. Co-Counselors who are reluctant to teach and must be counseled and encouraged to do so can be successful as teachers.
Teachers are expected to take complete responsibility for their classes. This includes taking responsibility for their own re-emergence in the context of teaching the class.
REASON
RC teachers are expected to be excellent models of RC theory. They attempt to guide their lives by rational thought and RC theory.
The use of harmful substances and participation in harmful activities is inconsistent with RC theory. Their use affects the full functioning of our minds, installs new hurts, and colludes with and reinforces oppression. The oppressive society promotes these substances and activities to numb people to oppression and silence their struggle against it.
No human would use these substances or participate in these activities in the absence of oppression, hurt, distress, and extensive targeting by profit-motivated entities. The damage caused by these substances and activities will yield to discharge.
In some cases those actively engaged in a struggle to end heavy addictions can be good RC teachers.
The current explosion of the global commercial sex industry and its normalization poses a challenge to the RC Community’s commitment to extend rationality worldwide. RC teachers must understand the far-reaching effects of this industry in general and for our work. This industry is designed to manipulate people to act irrationally, which undermines our ability to think clearly. We stand against the industry, and against the patterns of the individuals engaged in the industry, but not against the individuals themselves.
The sex industries are based in and promote patterns of male domination and sexism. They target particular oppressed groups—primarily women and girls but also poor people, LBGTQ people, and boys—with further exploitation. Men, oppressed by society into becoming agents of oppression, are targeted by the sex industries to become compulsive users. Increasingly women are also targeted. The sex industries distort the rational human need for closeness and affection and reinforce sexual distresses.
D.3. ASSISTANT TEACHERS
Where possible, teachers shall have assistant teachers. The assistant teacher should be someone the teacher would like to have as a Co-Counselor and believes will, with time, develop into a good RC teacher. Whenever possible, assistant teachers shall
1. have participated in at least one RC class series, or learned RC one-to-one,
2. be Co-Counseling effectively with other Co-Counselors,
3. be having regular Co-Counseling sessions,
4. be discharging in their sessions,
5. have read RC literature and counseled on any distress that makes that difficult,
6. have good relationships with local Co-Counselors, including the teacher,
7. be able to think about and support9 the teacher,
8. understand the purpose of the no-socializing policy and follow it willingly, and
9. be moving against any addictive behaviors.
REASON
Training assistant teachers is an important role of the RC teacher. Experience as an assistant teacher is an important part of an RC teacher’s development. Also, having more than one leader thinking about class members adds resource and strengthens the class. In addition, assistant teachers can provide important support for the teacher, including helping with the training of additional new teachers. An assistant teacher thinking about and supporting a teacher demonstrates functioning together against the pull of isolation.
D.4. NOT MIXING RC WITH OTHER THEORIES
No material other than RC is to be taught in RC classes. RC classes should be based on RC literature. In addition, RC teachers are expected to resist any pressure from their students or others to adopt currently popular concepts or constructs that are not consistent with RC. Teachers who mix RC with theories and practices that are in contradiction with RC (in cases of dispute, as determined by the IRP) may not offer to teach or claim that they are teaching RC.
REASON
All RC teachers find it challenging to keep their chronic patterns from diluting or degrading the theory and practice of RC, and all teachers are expected to guard against this happening. Additionally, people sometimes bring concepts from outside RC. Such concepts are not to be automatically accepted. They must always be examined and discharged on to ensure they are consistent with our theory. Permission to use the Trade and Service marks “Re-evaluation Counseling,” “RC,” “United to End Racism,” “No Limits for Women,” “Sustaining All Life,” and “Jews and Allies United to End Anti-Semitism”10 is authorized only with the understanding that this Guideline be followed.
E.1. STRUCTURE OF THE COMMUNITY— LEADERSHIP
Expectations of Leaders
All people taking leadership roles in the Re-evaluation Counseling (RC) Communities are expected to participate regularly in Co-Counseling, keep up-to-date on the developing theory, model a commitment to human liberation from distress and oppression, and, whenever possible, attend workshops and classes taught by other teachers. They are responsible for preparing people to step into their roles. They should encourage all Co-Counselors to become leaders, who will develop and lead other leaders, who in turn will lead other leaders, and so on. (See Guideline A.2.)
Leadership is Individual
RC operates on the assumption that leadership is individual. This makes accountability clear. One person is designated to lead each activity and organizational structure. All RC leaders are encouraged to seek others’ thinking about the activity. When there is more than one leader for a workshop (done only with the approval of the International Reference Person), one person is always designated as the key leader.
Reference Persons
Reference Persons exercise judgment about their constituency or Community in a manner consistent with RC theory and the Guidelines. Reference Persons foster a cooperative group of leaders. They provide strong counseling. They encourage new leaders to emerge. They can be consulted by constituency and Community members about theory and practice and can help solve difficulties between members.
REASON
Leading on the basis of the above is peerness in practice. It can nurture current leaders and develop enough additional leaders to reach everyone in the world. Encouraging each person to become a leader builds our Communities and promotes individual re-emergence.
We do not lead well in isolation. Leaders are encouraged to seek out others to share in the work and take on a variety of leadership roles. However, our experience has shown that having one designated leader leads to the best outcomes. “Rotating” leadership, “co-leadership,” and “collective leadership” do not work as well in our experience in RC. We want to make it possible for groups to move forward based on the best thinking available. We do need broad input. Also, people can with time reach general agreement or achieve consensus. However, important decisions often should be made without a lengthy delay and then tested in practice. The results of such decisions can be examined by the leader and, if necessary, the decisions can be modified based on the results.
E.11. DEVELOPING NEW REFERENCE PERSONS
All Reference Persons,11 in consultation with their Reference Person, are encouraged to actively assist experienced leaders to learn about, think about, and counsel on the possibility of stepping into a Reference Person’s role, including the current Reference Person’s role. Experienced leaders are encouraged to take initiative to learn about, think about, and counsel on training themselves and getting trained to lead more broadly and to be ready to play Referencing roles.12
“Experienced leaders” here means those who:
1. are experienced counselors with strong Co-Counseling relationships,
2. have been actively teaching and building the Community,
3. are able to work cooperatively with other leaders,
4. understand liberation theory and understand and follow the Guidelines, and
5. are able and willing to work toward taking on the Reference Person’s role.
(The processes for selecting the various Reference Persons are described elsewhere in the Guidelines; nothing here changes those processes.)
Reference Persons are encouraged to actively seek assistance to think about and counsel on the possibility of passing on their role.
Each person leaving a Reference Person’s role is encouraged to continue leading RC, using their experience to keep helping the Community or constituency grow and to explore new areas of leadership, including building new Communities. Each new Reference Person will build on the work of the previous Reference Person and will think about and do the job uniquely.
The primary focus of both the former and the new Reference Person will be their new leadership role. However, they are encouraged to assist each other in moving into and out of formal Referencing roles, with the assistance of their Reference Person.
REASON
We want to train and develop as many leaders as possible, as quickly as possible. People gain valuable leadership training and experience from being in the role and doing the job of a Reference Person. The RC Communities want to provide this opportunity to more people and to an increasingly diverse and representative group of people (including people of different ages, races, classes, and from other under-represented groups), without losing the leadership abilities and experience of existing Reference Persons.
We want all our leaders, including those who leave a Reference Person role, to continue to grow and develop their leadership. We do not want to lose the abilities or experience of any leaders.
F.2. DRAFT LIBERATION POLICIES
Re-evaluation Counseling theory and practice develop continually as we apply them to all issues facing humanity. We encourage every group to work together, in consultation with the IRP, to develop “draft liberation policy statements” that express the best thinking about the liberation of their group and guidance for the allies.
Our liberation policy statements are always draft liberation policy statements. They are always to be revised in the light of discharge, further information, more persistent thinking, and experiences in their application. No draft policy statement drawn up in the RC Communities is binding on any Co-Counselor. The only agreement required for members of the Re-evaluation Counseling Communities is to use the practice of RC to recover our occluded intelligence and to help others do the same.13
REASON
We encourage everyone to think about everything and to use our best thinking to guide our actions. Draft liberation policy statements guide liberation work in the RC Communities.
H.5. REGIONAL AND INTERNATIONAL WORKSHOPS AND GATHER-INS14
Unexpected Shortages
The organizer is expected to keep track of the workshop finances before and during, as well as after the workshop. If it appears that the workshop will not generate sufficient income to cover all expenses, this should be announced to the workshop with a request for funds to make up for the shortage.
H.8. MAINTAINING OUTREACH FUNDS
Sharing of Area Outreach Funds
If an Area generates far more Outreach funds than it uses, a portion of these funds may be donated to the Community Service Fund or to another Area’s Outreach fund.
Donations to Outreach Funds
Co-Counselors are welcome to voluntarily donate to the Outreach funds (Area and Community Service Fund) of the RC Community.15 Co-Counselors who would like to financially assist other Community members to attend workshops should consult with their Regional Reference Person and all such donations must be made anonymously.
REASON
Some Areas have accumulated large amounts of Outreach funds that are not regularly used. Areas that have large amounts in their accounts are encouraged to explore how they could use those funds to support other Areas.
H.13. ASSISTING THE RE-EVALUATION FOUNDATION’s OUTREACH EFFORTS
Fundraising
RC fundraising is to be done primarily on a one-to-one basis with individuals with whom people have existing relationships. Basic information about RC should be shared with potential donors. No individual Co-Counselor should be asked to donate funds for RC Community projects. Any local money-raising activities are to be planned in cooperation and consultation with the RRP.
We can create materials—posters, pictures, t-shirts, and so on—to help us remember and communicate our understanding about world change and moving against oppressions. These materials can be sold at RC events with the permission of the IRP. The money from their sale can be used to support our activities.
Online Fundraising
Online fundraising should not be used as a substitute for direct person-to-person fundraising. However, it can support one-to-one fundraising for a particular campaign and facilitate donations. Fundraising appeals can be made using the RC website and include information about the campaign. Online fundraising requires the agreement of the IRP and the Re-evaluation Foundation.
REASON
Reference Persons are in an excellent position to identify appropriate grantees and projects that further the goals of the Re-evaluation Foundation. They are most in touch with the needs and resources of the local or International Community. Co-Counselors are welcome to make donations to the RC Community. We can do this directly by contributing to the Re-evaluation Foundation, to Area Outreach Funds, or to the Community Service Fund (used to support RC internationally). However, we need to focus on soliciting funds from individuals who are not yet involved in RC.
One-to-one communication gives people the most accurate impression of RC and of reasons to financially support our activities. While communicating, we need to care about the person and give accurate information about RC. Funds should not be solicited on any other basis. Anyone solicited for funds should be viewed as a potential member of the RC Community. T-shirts, posters, and so on have provided many of us with contradiction to our distresses. Income from their sale helps spread RC.
Online fundraising is useful because many people have become familiar with it and find it an easy way to contribute. Fundraising online has made it possible for us to reach more people with our campaigns. It can make donating more simple and more easily accessible. However, in-person communication about the project is still primary.
Requesting donations from Co-Counselors can disrupt the safe environment of the RC Community. We must not allow any undischarged patterns about needs and money to interfere with the trust of Co-Counseling relationships. In addition, we do not want to create financial dependency within the RC Community. Co-Counselors need to use the discharge process and Community policy as resources for building our lives.
All Co-Counselors are encouraged to help raise funds for the RC Community. This is a re-emergent activity. Effective fundraising requires flexible intelligence—decision, discharge, thinking, and action. It leads to the reclaiming of power.
I.1. SPREADING RC PRACTICES AND INSIGHTS BEYOND THE RC COMMUNITY
The RC Community seeks to spread RC practices and insights (for example: discharge is helpful, listening with respect is more helpful than giving advice, validation of young people is better than punishment, physical contact is a rational need), as widely as possible in the general population.
Whenever we are in a group and have the opportunity, we can help people learn how to pay attention to each other. Doing this can include:
1. ensuring that everyone gets a turn to be listened to, including those hesitant to talk,
2. ensuring that people from groups that are traditionally silenced or disrespected are encouraged to speak and be listened to,
3. ensuring that no one’s turn is interrupted and no one is criticized,
4. encouraging people to take turns listening to each other in pairs, and
5. helping to create safety in the group by appreciating people’s efforts.
REASON
Large numbers of people are ready to use some of the basic insights and practices of RC. More people are ready to use them than are ready to function responsibly in the Communities. People can be given a chance to move their lives forward without being part of the RC Community.
K.6. USE OF PSEUDONYMS/ANONYMITY BY AUTHORS
The Re-evaluation Counseling Community will not provide lists of any kind through which Co-Counselors might be identified for oppressive or malicious purposes. When publishing in RC publications Co-Counselors whose writing reveals information that could put them in danger will use pseudonyms or write anonymously. RC publications include our journals, e-mail lists, the RC website, workshop announcements/flyers, and other RC resources. This way, the RC Communities do not risk colluding with oppression.
When RCers identify themselves in their writing in an RC publication as Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Intersex, or Queer people; as political activists or organizers in volatile16 situations; as immigrants without legal status; they are required to either use pseudonyms or to have their writing made anonymous. (These groups and whether they must use pseudonyms or have their writing made anonymous are determined by the IRP in consultation with the relevant ILRP or RRP.) The Re-evaluation Counseling Community will also not provide lists of any kind through which these Co-Counselors might be identified for oppressive or malicious purposes. Members of the RC Communities shall not disclose the identity of anyone using a pseudonym or writing anonymously.
Any individuals who believe they might be targeted because of an identification (mistaken or otherwise) with a group targeted by oppression should consult with their Reference Person about either using a pseudonym for their writings or having their writings made anonymous in RC publications.
Apart from in our RC publications, we are not discouraging or encouraging self-identification or visible leadership either inside or outside of RC. It remains an individual decision that should be discharged on and evaluated in consultation with Reference Persons.
(See K.5 for information about preserving confidentiality when writing about others)
REASON
Our goal is to help each other recover our occluded intelligence, which often leads to fresh and useful thinking, which we encourage. This Guideline makes it possible for RCers to fully express their thinking. It protects them and the Re-evaluation Counseling Communities from being targeted by oppression or malicious activity.
We are committed to the liberation of all people. We seek to make each constituency’s best thinking available to the entire RC Community—even when that constituency is currently or potentially the target of oppression. We cannot control where and to whom our publications are distributed. We must therefore take care that we do not accidentally collude with and bring on oppression. It makes sense to protect writers’ anonymity as we make their valuable thinking available to the RC Community.
The creation of social media accounts with a pseudonym identity is discouraged. When we attempt to create a pseudonym account on the Internet (for e-mail, social media, etc.), it will connect your real identity with your pseudonym identity. That information will be available to companies and governments. For that reason, some groups should not use pseudonyms, but instead should have their writings made anonymous. We will provide that service to RCers writing for RC lists and publications.
It is impossible to guarantee that use of a pseudonym or anonymous publication will keep an identity secure. But following this policy significantly lowers a Co-Counselor’s risk to exposure of identity.
Blaming, scapegoating, and otherwise targeting oppressed groups and activists distract people from the failures of the collapsing system and can take vicious and violent forms.
L.1. INTERNET SECURITY
Each Co-Counselor who uses the Internet should personally take on thinking, acting, and discharging about Internet security. Creating real Internet security in our Communities will require everyone in the Community to do this work.
Any time RCers send documents (including workshop rosters, data bases, and spreadsheets) containing information about Co-Counselors’ telephone numbers, identities, or confidential information over the Internet, the documents must be password-protected and the password sent by a separate e-mail or by other means. Documents containing information about groups of Co-Counselors should not include physical addresses unless there is no other means of contacting that Co-Counselor and that individual has given permission to provide this information. E-mails to large groups of Co-Counselors (more than fifteen) should have the recipients’ e-mail addresses in the Blind Carbon Copy (BCC) field. If discussion among the recipients is necessary, contact information should be included in a password-protected document.
RCers should not use Internet service sites other than the RC website to compile and organize such information.17
REASON
The Internet makes efficient communication and organization possible. However, its users are increasingly vulnerable to privacy infringement. Internet services collect personal data through automated processes. They collect the personal information revealed, includng the connections between members of the group and the connection between the members and the group. And they collect information on RC. They then use (abuse) this data for their own purposes.
Internet security not only depends on technology but also on where data is kept and who has access to it. The RC website is being made as secure as possible. It will be a good tool for organizing. No website is completely secure. However, the RC website is much more secure than free or commercial Internet services. (See Guideline N.3.)
We password-protect our documents to encrypt them and prevent the data in them from being collected and abused. Encryption makes unauthorized reading unlikely because too much work is required to decrypt them.
Using BCC is one way to stop spreading information beyond our own e-mail service. The more we use BCC the better it will protect us.
N.1. CO-COUNSELING RELATIONSHIPS
SUMMARY OF REASON
(The full reason is lengthy and has been moved to the Appendix.)
This Guideline supports and protects the one-point program (see Guideline A.3.) of RC. Counseling each other to eliminate distresses that interfere with our lives should be the only purpose of the Co-Counseling relationship.
We want to create and maintain a safe environment for all people (particularly young people, women, and members of other groups targeted by oppression). Further, we do not want undischarged patterns, including “frozen needs,” to interfere with the safety, trust, and effectiveness of the Co-Counseling relationship or the RC Community.
Adding activities to a Co-Counseling relationship that do not have re-emergence as the goal is damaging to the Co-Counseling relationship and a drain on the resources of the RC Community. This has been the long-term experience in the RC Communities. We can fulfill our human need for aware, supportive, social relationships by adding Co-Counseling to our relationships with friends and acquaintances.
(For more thinking about the reason for this Guideline, see the Appendix.)
N.3. ELECTRONIC COMMUNICATIONS
Electronic communications of any kind between RCers are to support the one-point program in accordance with the RC Community Guidelines, including the no-socializing policy and confidentiality. (See Guideline N.1.) If Co-Counselors use social media sites to communicate with other Co-Counselors, they are to do so only in ways that are consistent with the Co-Counseling relationship (not dramatizing distresses, not breaking confidentiality, and so on).
Co-Counselors are not to add Co-Counselors to online groups, e-mail lists, or websites unrelated to RC without their explicit request. Co-Counselors are not to add Co-Counselors on social media websites or social media applications (apps) without first individually communicating and agreeing to conduct the relationship in accord with the RC one-point program and no-socializing policy. We define social media websites and apps as websites and apps at least some portion of which is intended for sharing and uploading social content to a group of people not restricted to Co-Counselors. This is distinct from electronic communication in which the primary purpose is one-to-one contact or contact intended for a specific group of people. Many websites or apps have both social media components and components intended for one-to-one contact.
Co-Counselors are not to identify any other Co-Counselor as a Co-Counselor (through a picture, name, or any other personal information) on any public part of a social media website that is accessible to non-Co-Counselors. Co-Counselors are to get permission from other Co-Counselors before posting images of them on any website or app. This does not apply to Co-Counselors who have chosen to participate in RC “going public” projects (such as United to End Racism, Sustaining All Life, No Limits for Women, and Jews and Allies United to End Anti-Semitism). These Co-Counselors give consent to have their name and image used in connection with the going public project.
Social media websites are not to be used as a substitute for other Community-supported means of communication (the RC website, Area websites, RC e-mail lists, and so on). Sometimes non-public parts of social media websites or apps function in a way similar to RC Community-supported means of communication (such as the RC website, Area website, RC e-mailing list) and are used by Co-Counselors to create a closed group. A leader should be decided upon within each group to think about how they use the electronic communication in ways that are consistent with the Guidelines and the one-point program of RC. That leader should then consult and reach agreement with a Reference Person about the functioning of the group.
SUMMARY OF REASON
(The full reason is lengthy and has been moved to the Appendix.)
Social media websites and apps can be useful to Co-Counselors for connecting and exchanging information, for the functioning of the RC Communities, and for sharing the ideas and work of the RC Communities. They are best used in support of close and committed RC relationships. Co-Counselors using these websites and apps should be careful not to socialize.
Social media websites and apps are businesses motivated by their own economic and other interests. Their policies will not necessarily respect privacy or copyright and cannot be presumed to be secure.
(For more thinking about the reason for this Guideline, see the Appendix.)
P.2. HANDLING DISAGREEMENT, CRITICISM, AND UPSET
We are trying to build relationships with each other that do not involve our acting out our distress recordings at each other. These recordings include our confusions and unawareness that have come from the oppressions of our society as well as the particular individual hurts we have suffered. They also include frozen expectations of each other to be more than supportive Co-Counselors. We all need to discharge on all of these recordings and take responsibility for not acting out our distresses, including oppressor distresses.
We also understand that critical feelings, upsets, and many of our disagreements are based on the restimulation of past distresses rather than actual disagreements about current issues. We know that criticism of an individual is not useful and is different from disagreement with the individual’s idea or policy. Restimulations can pull us to unawarely and mistakenly dramatize our distress recordings at other Co-Counselors and particularly at RC leaders and the RC Community.
The following procedure is useful for correcting mistakes, interrupting patterns (including oppressor distresses), and discouraging gossip and attacks.
If a Co-Counselor has an issue needing to be addressed with another Co-Counselor, including an RC leader, it is effective to do the following:
1. counsel and discharge on the situation in a way that doesn’t spread the upset (for instance, without using names, by working on the related early hurts, and counseling with someone who has a good relationship with the person and isn’t pulled to gossip),
2. see the real situation as clearly as possible,
3. think of possible ways to resolve the situation, and, if the issue still needs to be addressed,
4. communicate directly with the individual involved so that we can listen to one another and possibly resolve the situation.
If the direct communication does not resolve the issue satisfactorily, or if communicating directly to the person is too difficult, the Co-Counselor should request the assistance of an experienced Co-Counselor, an RC teacher, or the appropriate Reference Person. If the issue still does not resolve, it may be taken to the next level of Reference Person.
It is not effective to express the disagreement, criticism, or upset to others, inside or outside of RC, except as stated above. It is not effective to rehearse upsets in the guise of discharging as a client in one’s sessions.
If the issue is not resolved and the individual becomes disruptive to the RC Community, then that individual will be denied access to the resources of the Community.
When a mistake has been made, it is effective to correct it by apologizing for the mistake to the people involved and cleaning up any negative effects.
When addressing an issue with a leader, it is important to discharge first (with someone other than the leader) on any distresses we have about leaders that confuse us and make it difficult for us to think well about the leader. Such distresses might include those that pull us to rehearse disappointment and criticism of leaders, or that leave us feeling powerless to think about or share our thinking with a leader. Leaders will benefit from discharging any early hurts that leave us feeling defensive or attacked in this process, so that we can listen to the information and possible correction being provided to us.
REASON
Most disagreements do not need to be addressed in this way. We do not need to agree on everything, and most of our disagreements do not need to be resolved immediately. They will resolve with continued discharge and new information. Usually no immediate decisions need to be made.
However, we want to ensure that disagreements, criticism, upsets, and the acting out of oppressive attitudes toward other Co-Counselors, including leaders, are handled effectively and in a manner that does not disrupt the ongoing work of the Communities.
Direct communication (without dramatization) gives the target of the disagreement, criticism, or upset an opportunity:
1. to learn directly of the situation,
2. to consider the content of the issue and any connected upsets,
3. to use discharge and communication to resolve the situation and make any needed corrections, and
4. to enlist outside resource when necessary.
Co-Counselors’ good work should not be disrupted by criticism and attacks. If used systematically, this process can deepen relationships and strengthen the Community.
Non-RCers can get confused about RC when we share with them our upsets about RC. It can make it more difficult to communicate with them about RC at a later time.
P.3. PUBLIC CRITICISM OF RC FROM OUTSIDE THE COMMUNITIES
Any local RC Community that finds itself being subjected to public criticism should contact the RRP. The RRP after gaining an understanding of the local situation should contact the IRP.
REASON
This assists the local leaders and Community members to discharge and think about handling the situation. It also helps the RRP and IRP understand the conditions in which the local Community operates and stop any possible spread of confusions.
N.3. SOCIAL MEDIA (LENGTHY REASON)
Social media websites and apps can help Co-Counselors connect and exchange information, and contribute to the functioning of the RC Communities. However, Co-Counselors using these websites and apps should be careful not to socialize, which we in RC have agreed not to do. We should make sure that our RC relationships do not become social ones.
Co-Counselors should be thoughtful about posting personal information on social media when other Co-Counselors have access to the posts. Co-Counselors who dramatize distresses on social media expose other Co-Counselors to those distresses (sometimes including addictive or other irrational behavior). This can damage the Co-Counseling relationship.
With thought and effort, social media tools can be used to support RC relationships. Our experience is that social media websites and apps are best used in support of close and committed RC relationships.
Most social media websites and apps are businesses in part motivated by their own economic, exploitative, and other interests of the oppressive society. They are intended to be addictive to their users. Their policies do not necessarily respect privacy, copyright, and so on. These non-RC communication tools are not designed for building RC relationships. They have different goals. If Co-Counselors mention the names of other Co-Counselors (except in the context of RC “going public” projects) on social media websites and apps, it violates our confidentiality agreement.
Electronic communication cannot be assumed to be private or secure. RCers need to think about confidentiality and the possibility that information from interactions on electronic communication (identity, personal information, session material, and so on) will be used to target people. This is especially important since RC exists in many countries with different legal and repressive systems.
Social media websites and apps can be useful for sharing the ideas and work of the Co-Counseling Communities. We have used them as part of our “going public” projects—such as United to End Racism, No Limits for Women, Sustaining all Life, and Jews and Allies Ending Anti-Semitism. “Going public” projects have different goals from the usual activities of the RC Community. Their purpose is to communicate RC theory and practice to people outside of the RC Communities. It has sometimes been helpful to post photos and other content from these projects on social media websites and apps. Co-Counselors participating in these projects are assumed to have given consent to have their photo used in conjunction with the “going public” project on social media websites or applications, personal social media accounts, the going public social media accounts (i.e., @SustainingLife1), and RC websites and publications.
(Present Time 189, October 2017)
1 Classes that introduce the theory and practice of Re-evaluation Counseling
2 Psychiatric drugs are substances prescribed by a psychiatrist or health care provider to “treat” what they call “mental illness” or difficulties such as sleeplessness, tension, stress, feelings of discouragement and passivity, anxiety, grief, “disruptive behavior,” and so on. They include substances like Ritalin that are widely prescribed to young people and others to enforce compliance and passivity.
3 Addictive behavior is the continued yielding to the restimulated feelings of a distress recording and acting out of its content.
4 Mind-altering drugs are those that act on the central nervous system and interfere with the thought process and/or the discharge and re-evaluation process.
5 RCers who use tobacco or e-cigarettes may teach RC so long as they are actively committed to ending the behavior and openly discharging on the struggle to do so.
6 Use of pornography is defined as the seeking out of written, audio, or visual materials that are intended to restimulate sexual feelings. Pornography is a form of sexual exploitation, mainly of women and young people, and exists within a context of sexism, male domination, young people’s oppression, men’s oppression, classism, racism, and LGBTQ oppression.
7 The sex industries are a global multi-billion dollar industry that profits off of commercial sexual exploitation. The sex industries include pornography, prostitution, Internet sex, escort services, strip clubs, erotic massage parlors, sex tourism, and sex trafficking.
8 A medication is a substance that treats, prevents, or alleviates the symptoms or causes of a disease or medical condition.
9 By support of a teacher, we mean thinking about the teacher and helping with the work.
10 Anti-Semitism refers to the specific oppression directed against the Jewish people. Although Arabs are also a Semitic people, the term anti-Semitism has always been used specifically to refer to the oppression of Jewish people.
11 All Area Reference Persons, Regional Reference Persons, International Liberation Reference Persons, International Commonality Reference Persons, and the International Reference Person
12 For descriptions of Reference Person roles, see Guidelines D.1., D.2., D.3., D.5., D.6., D.10.)
13 Community members are also required to follow the Guidelines and support their use.
14 This Guideline has the force of a requirement.
15 There is no personal tax benefit. But see donations to the Re-evaluation Foundation, H.13.
16 Volitile means rapidly changing circumstances, mostly for the worst.
17 Contact IRCC@RC.org for information about organizing workshops using the RC website.