The Reality Agreement
While cleaning out old files, I found some notes I took years ago after Harvey Jackins led a workshop on the Reality Agreement. I used the Reality Agreement in sessions for at least two years, fairly consistently, and while it was sometimes a challenge to stick to, it was very useful to me as a client, and as a counselor. I still find it useful. I think it is a challenge to use with most people who are relatively new to RC but worth trying with anyone. It is a discipline, which is one way to think of Re-evaluation Counseling. It takes mental discipline to be an active part of the RC Community. Below are the notes.
This is the way a session goes when using the Reality Agreement:
Counselor: For this to work, it is important that you and I are in agreement that the actual reality of the universe and everything in it is completely distinct from the pseudo-reality—accumulated from patterns, oppression, misinformation, lack of information, and the mistakes of the past—which has been presented to us as a substitute for reality. Are we agreed that these two things, the reality and the pseudo-reality, are completely distinct and do not have anything in common at all? (Sometimes working on this alone can take a good portion of a session, but it is worth getting the agreement. The client needs time to think about what it means, and if he or she tries to use the technique before this important first agreement, it will not work. This may be true for a client who has agreed to it many times before in other sessions.)
Client: Yes, I agree that this is so.
Counselor: And, in particular, that the sub-set of reality that is you, the actual nature of yourself, is different than the pseudo-reality that has often been pushed on you as a description of yourself—the invalidations, misunderstandings, disappointments, and oppression that you have been “told” are what you are like? Do you agree that these two, the reality of your true nature and this old pseudo-reality, are completely distinct from each other? (Again, this may require some time to think about and agree to and may need to be repeated, even by someone who has agreed to it in previous sessions.)
Client: Yes, I agree that this is so.
Counselor: With that agreement between us, I’m going to ask you some very simple questions, and I need your agreement that you will answer only from the viewpoint of reality itself, without any pseudo-reality being allowed into your answers. You may find this difficult (some people do), but if you slip, I will remind you to keep your answers based in reality, to stand firmly on that viewpoint and not allow any pseudo-reality into your answers.
Client: Yes, I agree to that.
Counselor: How good are you?
Client: I am completely good. (The counselor is patient but firm, reminding the client of his or her agreement to answer only from the perspective of reality, not pseudo-reality, and to stand firm in that agreement, at the very least for this session.)
Other questions a client can work on are many. Some might be “How innocent are you?” “How pure are you?” “How confident are you?” “How powerful are you?” “How completely are you to be trusted?” “How intelligent are you?” “How hopeful are you?” “How willing and able are you to stand up for what is right?” I now think how useful it might be to ask, “How hopeful are you that we can reverse climate change?” and other related questions.
Harvey suggested some advanced versions for people who are able to discharge well with the Reality Agreement, such as, “How ‘necessary’ is it that you compromise with pseudo-reality?” “How many other people do you actually need to have in agreement with you before you can initiate the actions necessary to save the world and lead a fully proud and powerful life yourself?” One could also try, “How good are other people?” “How safe are you now?” Each of these probably needs to be preceded each time with the first questions, so that in the particular session the client has made a genuine agreement about the complete distinction between reality and pseudo-reality.
Cary, North Carolina, USA
Reprinted from the e-mail discussion list for RC Community members
(Present Time 183, April 2016)