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Loud Sessions

Tim Jackins answering a question at the England Leaders’ Workshop, January 2014

Question: When someone gets loud in a Co-Counseling session, it sometimes seems to un-numb something that is preventing discharge. But it can also be distracting to people outside the session. Can you talk about loud sessions?

Tim Jackins: Loud sessions can be really useful. Most of us were made to be quiet. All societies try to keep things as quiet and smooth as possible as they creep their way to destruction. For most of us, making any noise at all, trying to object at all, is useful. Trying to get louder and louder is useful, because the pattern was of being quiet. But the effect on people outside the session can be a problem, so you have to take that into account and figure out the best thing to do at the moment.

Some people get frozen in yelling back, so their being loud in a session doesn’t contradict the pattern. You can hear the tone. It gets stiff and loud. It’s an imitation of someone yelling at them. It’s more a portrayal of the distress than a going against it. You can hear the deadness of it. It’s hard to listen to, because it isn’t actually discharge.

What do you do when people get stuck in making the same loud noise? You can ask them to object quietly. You can also get them active in a different way. Pushing against you can provide something real and alive, so they’re not just yelling at the dead past. It gives them an excuse to come alive in their opposition.

You have to move in to be more in contact with them. Anytime someone is frozen in a pattern, more attention is needed. If you have the slack, you push in, or maybe have them grab your shoulders and shake you, not just stay with the sound alone. If you don’t have the slack, then you switch subjects and have them work on something else.

Last modified: 2020-07-01 08:50:08+00