O.1. Handling Attacks[94]

Attacks on Co-Counselors or on the Re-evaluation Counseling (RC) Community will not be tolerated. All Co-Counselors are expected to quickly interrupt both attacks and gossip.[95] In preparation, Co-Counselors need to counsel on whatever obstructs their ability to do so.

An attack may be either an organized attempt to disrupt the functioning of the Community or a smearing of an individual Co-Counselor. Trying to get others to support one’s upset with a Co-Counselor or the Community is also an attack.

It is not an attack to

  1. think that an error has been made;
  2. be upset with someone;
  3. question others about their thinking; or
  4. argue for a different point of view.

It is a mistake to criticize our Co-Counselors or try to force them to be our counselors on issues or upsets, but that is not what is meant by an attack.

People who participate in an attack must first stop the attack and apologize for having participated in it. An apology is necessary to restore the relationship and trust. Counseling resource should not be offered to them until after they have stopped the attack and apologized.

REASON

Attacks are not attempts to correct mistakes. They are dramatizations of distress[96] and are not acceptable behaviors within the RC Community. An underlying motivation may be to attract attention and get counseling help with the distress. However, an attack is not an effective way to get help or to resolve disagreements or difficulties. Upsets and disagreements need to be acknowledged and handled or they may become attacks. (See Guideline O.2., Handling Disagreement, Criticism, and Upset.)

Attacks are harmful to the RC Community and to the Co-Counselor targeted by the attack. They restimulate and confuse people. They disrupt the functioning of the RC Community and the targeted Co-Counselor. Any attack should be quickly interrupted to end the disruption. Underlying issues cannot be addressed during an attack. When the attack has stopped, the process described below (Guideline O.2., Handling Disagreement, Criticism, and Upset) can be used to address the situation.

Co-Counselors involved in an attack must be responsible for their actions and for any confusion their actions may have caused. This helps everyone involved to resolve the situation. Responsibility includes

  1. acknowledging that a mistake has been made;
  2. apologizing for having participated in the attack; and

committing to discharging the distresses that caused it.


[94] This Guideline has the force of a requirement.

[95] Gossip is casual or thoughtless reports on or conversations about other people, typically involving details that are not confirmed as true.

[96] A dramatization is the acting out of a distress recording without discharge, and often without an agreed-upon counselor.


Last modified: 2019-05-02 14:41:35+00