This article was from talks by Azi Khalili and Teresa Enrico at the third meeting of the “Toward Unity” gathering for Global Majority People, Regional Reference Persons, Area Reference Persons, and teachers and leaders from Africa, Latin America, the Caribbean, Europe, and North America.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE AN ALLY?
Being an ally requires a perspective many of us are not accustomed to. Most of us did not grow up learning what it means to be an ally to another group.
In RC, we are committed to putting all assumptions and definitions under the light of discharge and re-evaluation. We decided not to use “mainstream concepts” that were not rational. For seventy years, we have developed fresh rational ideas.
This process has never been smooth. It has not been easy to not automatically accept the most “popular” ideas. It has not been easy to give up some ideas because they have been part of our traditions. Doing anything different can be scary. Over and over, by means of discharge and re-evaluation, we have been able to not salute our feelings [act according to our feelings] as we try to reach for rationality.
After much discharge and re-evaluation, we figured out that as allies we must stand with all humans, whether they are oppressors or oppressed, while also standing firmly against their distresses.
Outside of RC we are often pushed to take sides—“good” people versus “bad” people, enemy versus us, the oppressed versus the oppressor.
We take a “side” in RC, too—the human side of human beings!
Even in RC, it has been difficult to be on the side of all humans given how hurt we are and how divided we have been. We have not perfected this yet!
Our intention in RC is to stand with all humans, without reservation, and to oppose oppressive systems and their effects on our minds. We understand deeply that hurt people hurt people—and we have learned over many years that every human is deeply hurt. Therefore, we stand with every human—to heal the hurts and dismantle systems of oppression, including colonization, enslavement, and genocide.
Being an ally in RC is complex. It requires a lot of discharge and re-evaluation. It requires understanding the history of different groups. It requires actively listening to members of groups that have been pitted against each other. It requires deeply caring for all people, and taking rational, intentional action for the liberation of all minds.
An effective ally engages in many activities. We would like to emphasize the following:
Discharge, Discharge, Discharge: To gain an accurate perception of reality, allies get to discharge and re-evaluate about all issues. We have internalized massive amounts of misinformation about one another. We get to identify all the distresses that manipulate us to not see what’s true about every human.
Connection, Connection, Connection: Nothing can replace deep, meaningful human connections. Connection is crucial in building unity. Even if people don’t understand discharge as we do in RC, we can create conditions for connection that can enable minds to open, move, and see possibilities. Discharge makes this process more reliable and faster.
Understanding Oppression: Being an ally involves reclaiming curiosity and learning. Allies get to educate ourselves about the specific forms of oppression faced by the groups we are supporting. This includes learning about their history, their current issues, and the lived experiences of the group’s members. As allies we have the chance to continually educate ourselves about the issues faced by all groups and work hard to uncover accurate histories of all people, histories that are often obscured by systems of oppression.
Listening and Learning: Allies get to listen to the voices and experiences of the people in each group. We learn about the conditions facing all groups.
Examining our Role: As allies we get to honestly and courageously reflect on our own role in perpetuating oppression and injustice.
Taking a Stand Against Distress: As allies, we get to oppose all distress and offer contradictions to it. Being an ally does not mean being permissive with distress, whether it is oppressor or oppressed distress. We can develop an independent perspective and interrupt the distress. We get to actively prevent a group from hurting another group.
Unity: The role of an ally is not to give importance to the feelings and the divisions. It’s to create opportunities for groups to reach for one another. We don’t need certainty; we need possibilities for unity. Achieving unity among humans is challenging. We hope that one day we can achieve it. It requires continuous discharge and re-evaluation while at the same time dismantling the unjust structures of our society.
Unity is about being courageous and honest. It’s about looking at reality head-on and moving toward healing. It is about reaching for one another when every force is tearing us apart. It is about making a stand against any place where we are manipulated to act opportunistically (to want good things for our group at the expense of another group). Unity is the absence of division. It is the absence of blaming.